I Have a Love/Hate Relationship with Dairy

When I was little, I was sort-of lactose intolerant. By sort of, I mean that if I ingested too much dairy in a short period of time, I'd get something akin to a cold. I grew out of it by the time I hit my teens. The same thing happened to my aunt and Fratello (granted, Fratello was allergic to EVERYTHING; milk, eggs, wheat, beans, etc).

Junior year; I had a New Year's party. Just before the party, I had some oreos. But, as always, oreos just aren't as good without milk. So, being a daring individual (because I generally don't drink milk, it tastes funny), I poured myself a glass of milk. It tasted a bit funny, but Mater said it was fine, so I drank it. It turned out to be TWO. WEEKS. EXPIRED. I spent all of New Year's Eve with the porcelain god.

I don't drink milk anymore. Fucking evil cow juice.

Senior year; Sorella and I were left home alone for a weekend. Being unconventional, we decided to get smashed alone instead of with a large group of people.

[Just a note - Rum is NOT your friend. Captain Jack Sparrow is lying.]

Anyways, I drank enough to puke my brains out. Sorella, having a bit more experience with booze, was unaffected. In the middle of the puking, I got a call from my (now) ex-girlfriend. She was pretty straight edge, so I told her that I had eaten expired yogurt. We later fed Mater the same story when I wasn't feeling well when she came home.

I didn't actually eat any yogurt. But I did develop a generalized taste aversion* to yogurt.

Tonight; I had a milk shake from Friendly's. It was a damn yummy milkshake. While I was in the bookstore, it only made my stomach uncomfortable, like I ate too much. The moment I went outside to listen to the Mc'lovins play, I became so incredibly nauseous (Pater later explained that heat speeds up bodily functions). I went home and threw up my milkshake.

Clearly, dairy has something against me. I don't understand why. I really hope I don't get an aversion to milkshakes now.

Wander safely,
Arc.

*Psychology term - Generalized Taste Aversion, discovered by Dr. John Garcia, occurs when someone (or rather, an animal) associates a certain feeling or taste with a food. Because I was thinking of yogurt when I puked up my liquor, the thought of yogurt now makes me nauseous.

Time Management: Come Again?

New Year’s Resolutions: a time of reflection, to better yourself, to change what you don’t like...A time to make many claims you won’t follow through with.

I never got the point of New Year’s Resolutions. Why wait for January first to change something about yourself? Is it supposed to make it a more credible change or something? I bet you won’t be surprised to know that more gym memberships are made in January than any other month of the year.

I don’t save my resolutions for New Year’s. I don’t believe it has special powers, or will make me a better person. I make me a better person any day of the year. On this particular day, I think I need better time management, especially with a new semester approaching fast.

I’m a horrible, horrible procrastinator. I write papers due at ten am at two am, or sometimes even two hours before class. I once spent nine hours in front of a computer the day before a massive research paper was due because I hadn’t started it yet. I think I made Mater fear for my sanity that day; we’d be sitting in a silent room, both of us working away, and all of a sudden I’d scream at the top of my lungs and slam my head into the desk. It happened many times.

My poor time management is not a new thing. When a teacher says, “This isn’t an assignment you can do in one night”, I think; Challenge accepted. Bring it on. While this mindset makes it incredibly impressive when you get your project back with an A-, and you can state proudly, “I did all of this the night before”, it’s really not fun. It’s nerve-racking, painful, and exhausting. It only gets worse in college. 

So, with this lovely BOW’11 challenge, I am attempting to manage my time. At least this way, I can do it with something. For example, it is currently January third at 8:43 pm. It was originally going to be posted on the tenth, but I felt like posting something funny (see that last pretty post down there?). LOOK AT ME BE PRODUCTIVE!

...Yeah, productivity isn’t a strong point of mine, either. Sure, I could write my term paper, or I could read fanfiction. I could read the required chapters for English, or I could crochet a hat. I could do my Italian homework, or I could knit. You see where this is going.

Scratch that; I am productive. I make a lot of hats, scarves, and hand warmers. I teach people how to knit, crochet, and I maintain a job. I’m just really, really bad about my homework.


The highlight of my first semester at college? I crocheted EIGHTEEN HATS.

Wander safely,

Arc.